OTP 1 - Royai

So this is where I've actually been spending most of my time while not playing video games - reading fanfiction. It all began when I decided to re-watch FMA: Brotherhood while studying for my finals because I needed something long and that I didn't need to pay attention too. I also re-read the manga just for kicks and I suddenly got overwhelmed by Royai feels and my overall love of Riza Hawkeye and Roy Mustang (they are just such a badass power couple) - and then after I moved on from that there was the whole thing with FFX/X-2 - Tidus x Yuna (although there is not a lot of good fic with them so that really didn't take up much of my time). Then - tumblr introduced me to Jelsa, which is Jack from RotG and Elsa from Frozen and ever since then I've just.. like. That's the end of the road - still waiting for this latest obsession to pass over but it seems like it might take a while because there's a lot of on-going fic happening that I'm dying to have finished.

So let's start with FMA


FMA Schpiel on Character Dynamics/Relations - Focus on Royai with some Ed, Al, and Team Mustang

Royai is my ultimate OTP - like hands down. It probably helps with the fact that Riza Hawkeye is my most favourite character of all time (sorry, Gin kind of got removed from that position - probably because he's been dead for so long). But Riza. Hawkeye. Like - can we just take a detour for a moment and talk about the sheer badass that she is? She doesn't know alchemy  and yet she owns everybody with just a freakin gun - like she actually manages to hold her own pretty damn well. Yeah - you can also bring in Olivier Armstrong as equally badass (if not more because I wouldn't argue with you on that point) - but I also like Riza's characterization more. She seems aloof and almost cold but she's not - maybe it's cause the story is from Ed/Al's POV (mostly) but Riza always gave me this motherly feel. She's firm with honest with the boys and you can tell they respect the hell out of her.

Everyone always goes on about Roy x Ed (which I find really fucking creepy to be honest but maybe it's cause I've always seen them as a more parental thing - Parental!Royai with Ed+Al is like.. dream fic - so good, but I'm digressing) but I feel like in reality Ed and Al feel a lot closer to Riza than they do Roy. Sure they respect Roy and he is probably the closest thing they  have had to a father figure (I feel Al is a bit more open about this than Ed would be) but with Riza I feel see both of them kind of just adoring her. She's honest, straightforward - Roy is as well but almost in a condescending way like "This is how the world is, I would've figured you guys would be used to it by now *smirk*" where as Riza stands beside him, rolls her eyes, gives the boys apologetic looks and is like "It's true but I'm sure you can handle it, you two have always been strong". And then Team Mustang is just a big group of big brothers to Ed and Al - like I see them having awesome relationships and pulling crazy dumb pranks with Havoc and Breda.

Actually I could write an entire post on what I think of Riza and Roy - because I have a lot to say on that but I'll summarize it in my next schpiel about why I love Royai and think they're the most amazing couple to ever be (they are canon damn it - they are).

Starting with my headcanon - I feel like they never really got together until after Ishval - even as friends. I feel like when they were younger Roy was always nice and courteous but Riza was too shy and quiet to interact with him much and Roy was just too busy. They weren't really friends though - they trust each other and I feel like they did share a few secrets and have a few talks but nothing close to what they have in FMA. I feel like that relationship didn't come about until Ishval and after. She didn't so much give Roy flame alchemy because he was an awesome friend and she trusted him - but more because he was the only one. It was the only way for her to let this go - to really do something with herself. She had this tattoo on her back, her dad died, and there was really no one else.

Then Ishval changed everything. She sees Roy destroying people. She herself is killing people one by one, purposely, knowingly, willingly - and it nearly breaks her. But then there is Roy again - idealistic, still shining with that goal of his he had told her way back by her fathers grave and she wants to believe. The thing is Roy was shattered too - when Roy was out there he snapped his fingers, thought about Riza, and wanted to kill himself from the guilt. Riza has always been his guilty conscience ever since she gave her back to him - up until this very moment. This role he gives to Riza never changes - but along with it forms a sense of trust, because he knows that Riza really will act as his conscience. It's not just a thought in his mind anymore, she's not just a voice in the back of his head - she is literally, physically standing behind his back telling him which way to step and how to move forward.

The thing I love about this relationship is how mutual it is. I remember someone saying they didn't like Royai because it would always bee a superior/subordinate relationship - no matter what he would be her colonel and her, his lieutenant but I feel that's not the case at all. Arakawa has shown many times that Riza doesn't give a fuck what Roy says and will disobey him if she has too. Just because they have a literal "rank" from their military jobs it doesn't mean either of them see their relationship that way. Riza just stays his lieutenant out of convenience - but Roy has never seen her as his subordinate. They are equals - completely and utterly - both on a work and emotional level. They both give each other a reason to move forward.

See - I don't see their relationship as "romantic" - I mean I enjoy reading fluffy fics about them and cute moments but I feel like their love is largely built on companionship and trust. I believe they'd had sex but it's far and in between. The first time was just based on need, a worried phonecall one night of "I can't sleep" and suddenly Roy is at her door and they're both kind of just lost and not really sure what's going on. It was consensual, they don't regret it, it didn't make anything awkward. Even now I feel like that's how it always works - you can say that's almost like having a 'friend with benefits' thing going on but I just think neither of them really believe that they should or could indulge in something so intimate - their hands are dirty, literally caked in blood - to have a normal "loving" relationship that you would see in romance novels, or movies. At least for now. The person in me that likes happy endings would like to think that after Roy becomes fuhrer they'll let themselves indulge in happiness and pleasure (and start a family). Until then though? Debatable.

With that being said I don't believe that they are dancing around each other awkwardly. I think they are both very aware of how they each feel for one another - and they don't need to say it. It's understood in the way they silently communicate, through actions, glances, and codes.

So there we go. 

This was just supposed to be a general post about Royai and Jelsa but I guess I'll move my Jelsa schpiel to another post coming soon. :)

Final Fantasy X/X-2

Raising my head from the dead. Hi - it's been a while. I've actually been doing quite a bit on the fangirl front but the main thing I was focused on in January was Final Fantasy X/X-2. I watched my brother play FFX all the way through so I've never actually played it myself - but I literally watched him play the entire time so I know everything about it. So what triggered this return back to FFX? Well the release of the FFX/X-2 HD re-master.

So what I did in January was watch a playthrough of FFX because I thought it would be a good idea and it was terrible because I will never get over the end of FFX. Ever. And the music and just the entire god damn story of the game had me rolling around in tears from beginning to end. For some reason it was even more painful watching it knowing what was going to happen because you know from day 1 that Tidus is going to disappear and somehow that just makes everything worse. So yeah - got my heart ripped out and I decided that you know what, apparently he comes back in FFX-2 so I would go and check it out.

I honestly went into FFX-2 with no idea of what the story was - I totally thought the guy in the sphere was Tidus but then all this stuff about Shuyin started happening and I was like "what the fuck no". Overall I'd say the game was OK. Like. It was enjoyable as like a fun... add-on. Kind of like an expansion pack - so in that respect the game was fine. I liked the new cast of characters (Paine, Baralai and Gippal more so than the rest) but the whole thing between Shuyin and Lenne was kind of lacking. There was no way to get into those characters so their romance was like "eh" and you kind of just feel burned at the fact that they're not Tidus and Yuna and let's be real - that's the only reason I wanted to play this game.

Of course then I beat the game and Tidus does come back (I didn't 100% it but I honestly don't feel like trying with youtube around) and it was nice. I was happy. Yay. And then there's Last Mission which I didn't play but just decided to watch the cut-scenes of and WHAT IS WITH LAST MISSION?  Like. Why is Paine saying stuff like "This might be the last time we meet" like - oh come on guys you're supposed to be friends. And from the sounds of it Yuna is living it up in Besaid with Tidus so really both of you guys could just drop  in whenever you want and she'll probably be there. None of that "もう会えないかもしれない" crap.

But moving on - so I don't really know where I'm going with this post. I really just finished X-2 last week so I just needed to get all this out so then I can tell you about other things (my recent obsession with Jelsa (Jack x Elsa from RotG and Frozen)).

What I really want to end with though is that to be honest Tidus coming back in FFX-2 didn't satisfy me, I wanted to hear about kids and babies and stuff and then I found this amazing fic called Spira's Dream (and it has two sequels and a prequel about Shuyin) and it's glorious and it's become my headacanon. Like. That story is what I firmly believe what happened after he returns in X-2 and it's glorious.

So yeah. FFX/X-2. Tidus x Yuna - a new/old OTP of mine. This game is awesome. Next game I'm moving on to? Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance because I never beat it on the gamecube (was too dumb of a kid at that time) so I will attempt to now.... in Japanese. Oh god what did I get myself in to?