More random Gin x Ran thougts to get off my chest

So I just started thinking in the shower (because that's where we all do our greatest thinking, don't lie!) and I know how I said in my previous post that in some ways Gin's death brings it's own sense of closure - and it does in the sense that she won't hold on to him because he's given her nothing to hold on to.

On the other hand his death is still super tragic for her and part of me wonders how long it took before someone was able to drag Rangiku away from Gin's body because I feel like she must've sat there for a very, very, very long time... until she had no more tears to cry, until she was exhausted, until Hitsugaya, or Hisagi, or someone had to literally pick her up and drag her screaming and the only way they could shut her up was to pretend to take Gin's body with them... except then they just dump it somewhere because I feel Captain-Commander Yamamoto wouldn't be so forgiving.

The thing is - Hisagi and Komamura get a very finite sense of closure because they realise that Tousen is completely deluded and bad. It's not that he became misguided and could be helped back on to the right path - he chose this path because he honestly thought it was right and although they had to struggle to over come this and accept this reality they could do it in the physical form of killing him. For Rangiku she gets none of this. What she gets is the realisation that one again, Gin has saved her and then the next moment he's dead. She doesn't know the details but the fact that Gin saved her is already enough because it's a redeeming factor. It's a fact that high lights the idea that Gin wasn't "that bad". That despite all this crap he still cared for her and for all you know she has come to the conclusion that it was possible that he died for her. She might not know the reason for how this happened - she might think it's because Aizen realised Gin had not killed her (and that would just be so heartbreaking for her to take) or she might take the easier route and just believe that Ichigo had cut him down and she wouldn't even bother asking for clarification because somewhere deep down she knows that couldn't have happened.

Honestly when I see that scene in anime, or re-read it in the manga (I don't purposely go out of my way to do it but it comes up as .gifs on tumblr often enough - seriously I'm not that masochistic) it breaks my heart to see the tears because he's left her with so many mysteries and for those first couple of days in mourning it must've been so hard on her. So hard for her to realise that Gin had saved her, had probably died for her, that even until the very end - despite what everyone else had thought, including Rangiku herself - Gin had prioritized her life as the most important thing to keep safe. And yes - in some ways this brings her closure because although she understands this, like I said, Gin hasn't actually given her anything concrete to confirm these thoughts so in the end she can just leave them as mysteries as she's always done and that's more helpful to her. Because I think if Rangiku did know everything, did know his motives, she really never would've left his side. She would've stayed by his dead body agonizing over the fact that he really did die for her and that would really just kill her inside. But she doesn't know that for sure and so she can keep going.

....ugh. I need to stop. These two are ruining my life and my ability to study for my mid-terms.

Once again, I'm begging Kubo to just bring Gin back to life for my own sanity.

Obligatory Gin x Ran feels post of the year

I started watching Bleach when I was twelve and like any little twelve year old I thought Hitsugaya Toushiro and his ice abilities was the coolest thing to ever hit the planet. Then we get to his fight with Ichimaru Gin and up until this point I thought he was amusing but... you know, that was it. Up until this point. And then we get the flashbacks, the fight and how coolly he takes everything.... and it was that day that I decided Ichimaru Gin is my most favourite character, period. As in throughout all series of anime or manga or books or movies, Gin is hands down my most favourite character ever.

嵐 - 時計じかけのアンブレラ

(Translation Index: Here)

時計じかけのアンブレラ - Clockwork Umbrella

不思議なことばかり　何信じればいいの
もし迷うなら　俺のそばにいて

Nothing but mysterious things, what should I believe in?
If you’re lost, stay to my side

初めて見る風景　君の胸生まれる
疑う(うたがう)よりも歩き出してみて 　（過去　未来… 今）

Seeing for the first time this landscape, which was born from your heart
Instead of doubting, try taking a step forward (the past, the present… now)

Ah Ah, Lady, Come on baby
心に差したアンブレラで
敲く（たたく） fly me  Do you wanna with me
ここでゼロから

Ah ah, Lady, Come on baby
With this umbrella held up over my heart
Fly me, do you wanna with me
From here on starting from zero

時計じかけの　ラブソング好きさ
ロマンチックな針が交わる瞬間　抱き寄せて
君が居ればいい　何も要らない
二人で歩く長いこの回り道に　夢がある

I love this clockwork love song
Hold on to the romantic moment when the hands of a clock cross
As long as your here it’s fine, I don’t need anything
On this long, circling, path that both of us walk on, there is a dream

My love go on & on
Your love go on & on

胸に火燃ゆる導火線　
いっそこのままどう成れ
もう俺もここまで　
我慢知らぬ大人で (あ,もうだめ）
夢はどこかで
いつか奏でていた音を変える　
この旅路どこまで
迷わぬよう二人の帆を立てる

This burning fuse in my chest
Might as well see what will happen to it
This is as far as I can go
As an adult who doesn’t know patience (ah, I can’t take it anymore)
Somewhere in my dreams
The sound that’s been playing will some day change
How far is this journey?
So that we won’t lose our way let’s put two sails up

まだだめ　まだだめ　朝まで暖め
明日の種まけ　裸で暖め

Not yet, not yet, keep it warm until morning
Spread the seeds of tomorrow and warm them with your bare skin

ずっともっと遠回り
街は辺り変わり
響くあまい話り
生まれくる愛のさなぎ

An even longer detour
The towns surrounding us change
A sweet story echoes
A chrysalis of love is born

真実は何　誰も知らない
確かなことは　君はゼロから

What is the truth? No one knows
The only thing I’m certain of is you starting from zero

嘘でいいから傷付くだけで真実
心の奥そっとしまうから

Even if it’s a lie, the truth will only hurt
So I’ve softly hidden it inside my heart

雨が二人も濡らし続けても
大切なのは君がいるで

Even if the rain continues to soak us
The important thing is that you’re here

その二人たくさん咲いた未来の花を温めて
優しい傘そっと差して行こう

Warm up the many flowers of the future that have bloomed for us
Let’s raise this gentle umbrella and quietly go on

時計じかけの　ラブソング好きさ
電気ショックに痺れたキスの瞬間　止めないで
君が居ればいい　何も要らない
二人で歩く長いこの回り道に　夢がある

I love this clockwork love song
Don’t stop this moment where our kiss is numbed by an electric shock
As long as your here it’s fine, I don’t need anything
On this long, circling, path that both of us walk on, there is a dream

愛の嵐で　離したくない
二人描いたこの希望の落書きを　地図にして

In the storm in love, I don’t want to let go
We’ll turn this graffiti of hope that we drew into a map

My love go on & on
Your love go on & on

大野智 - Two

(Translation Index: Here)

大野智　-　Two

車窓に重なる　隣で微笑む君
こんなにもうすぐそばにいても　触れる事はできない
ステレオから流れる調べ今はただ切なくて
僕だけの君にしたくて

Overlapping on the car window is you beside me, smiling
Even though you’re this close to my side, I can’t touch you
The tune coming from the stereo, right now it’s just sad
I wish I could make you mine

So don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
このまま夜が明けても
Don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
帰したくないから

So don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
Just like this, even when dawn breaks
Don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
Because I don’t want to let you go back home

もう少しだけでいい　何も言わず follow me
君を連れ去りたい　胸が叫ぶから
I need you, I need you, I need you
たとえ今夜が最初で最後の夜でも

Just a bit more is fine, follow me without saying anything
I want to take you away, because my heart is crying
I need you, I need you, I need you
Even if tonight is the first and final night

月明かり浴びる　急に黙り込む君
Highwayを当てなくて漂う　止まる事はできない
いつからだろうかどんな景色よりもずっと眩しくて
君だけが惑わせるから

Bathing in the light of the moon, you, who suddenly fell into a silence
Wandering on this highway, unable to stop
When was it, that you were more dazzling than the scenery
Only you keep leading me astray

So don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
心をちょっと振り向いて
Don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
離したくないから

So don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
Turn your heart slightly around
Don’t ever go, ever go, ever go, go away
Because I don’t want to let you go

誰一人壊せない　二人だけのdestiny
泣かないでそのひとみ抱きしめられたら
l love you, I love you, I love you
せめて今夜は永遠の時を願うよ

No one can destroy our destiny
When I hug you, pleae don’t cry from those eyes
l love you, I love you, I love you
Let’s pray for an endless amount of time, at least for tonight

伝えたい言葉さえしまい込んだとしても
愛しさが溢れていく震えるほど

Even if I hide away all the words I want to tell you
My love is overflowing to the point I’m shaking

もう少しだけでいい　何も言わず follow me
君を連れ去りたい　胸が叫ぶから
I need you, I need you, I need you
たとえ今夜が最初で最後の夜でも

Just a bit more is fine, follow me without saying anything
I want to take you away, because my heart is crying
I need you, I need you, I need you
Even if tonight is the first and final night

Regarding Tortall: Thoughts on Kel

Despite having read Song of the Lioness and The Immortals quartets numerous times and Tricksters quite a few times, I've only read Protector of the Small for the second time recently, just finishing the last book two nights ago. Why? Simply because when I first read PotS, at the age of twelve or so, Kel didn't interest me at all and so I never thought of giving it another go. Until now of course.

For the first... two and half parts of the quartet (so about half way into Squire) I still don't find Kel a particularly interesting character. It's actually not until a bit into Lady Knight that I finally start liking her and respecting her, but only in that one book. Overall I still think she's a bit too.... bland.